(just when I thought I was all barbed-wired-meat)
Why is it I love you more and more, without cause or explanantion, without heed or warning, this growing within me, this suridty, so sure and ready, so eager, to hold you and fall forever, to rest and finally take off my face, my clothes, my skin, to lie with you naked and free of the world and hold you in my arms and to be held, all the raw points out, all the nerve endings open to your touch, to love you as I�ve always wanted to love and be loved?
(every breath I�ve held in me was marked up in sadness, full, damp, a closed room, silence and dust)
Why is it you have come at a such a perilous point in my life, when I have finally forgotten much more of myself than what I remember, what it meant to be alive in another person�s eyes, your eyes dazzling upon me like a warm friend, like a name remembered that would be at the tip of your tongue, or the pleasure of hearing your heartbeat after a long run.
(everything electro-light-colors-faded-through-rainbows and eyes-by-the-dozens-to-see-one-thing-more)
Why is it that you have such a hold on me, it traps me in folds of skin, feeling trapped in being in only one set of skin, one set of nerves, one set of sounds that are only my own and not yours also, how incredibly small I feel, how I feel I could squeeze into that one corner that would bring me to you, how impossible to feel this compression when there is all these miles between us.
(One moment-splice-unbearable-figment of a memory where your skin is pressed against mine and the doors are closed)
Can you explain why I love you in this way, why it grows the way it does, in all directions, like the sea, where did all this space in my heart come from?
(twinkle-toe-under-the-sheet-anitcipation for your voice to come to me)