Ba,

There is so much I have come to appreciate about you over the years, there is so much I am embarrassed of.

How do you did do it? How did you not just put me in my place when I was so sure, so arrogant, so clearly stupid? How did you keep a straight face when I thought I knew anything about anything. I remember, I remember trying to tell how life was, what I knew about it. I wish I could laugh about it now, but instead I cringe. Instead, I try now to be more humble. I look at my kids and sometimes, not as often as when I was there age, I see it. I see the same pompousness and I wonder: is this what you saw? And like you then, I do not mock them, do not put them in their place. I think to myself, oh man, I hope they get it later on. I listen, I give advice, I let them breathe, I let them get there on their own without them crashing into the rails.

So thank you Ba, thank you for putting up with my stupidity and my confusion. Thank you for putting up with my laziness and my worries. Thank you for tugging me gently from the edge and for pushing me towards the road. The older I get, the more I’ve come to appreciate you and the stronger your voice in my head becomes.

Keep talking to me Ba, even when I don’t show it, I am still listening.