and in the shower i had the idea if only i had seen it in a dream and it would’ve been better but i was naked and the water finally turning hot and i split-imagined a river of ants coming out of my penis, a stream of roaches and bugs crawling out, snuggling out, dripping out, marching out and down and around my scrotum and thigh, pulling free, pushing through, one over another, until at the very end, and the only moment i felt any pain, a monarch butterfly struggled free, as if from a cocoon, and spread its wings and fluttered away